i’m watching this commercial
it’s for coca cola and it’s going on about how only two guys in the world know the formula and they each know part and so on
it’s cute
but i read the formula years ago.
i’m marlowe
i’m a snoop i can’t help it
i can tell you how they made it in 1909
i can tell you how they made it in 1935 (still the passover recipe with yellow cap)
i can tell you how they make it now. i can tell you they work with the only factory in the United States that is allowed to import coca leaves legally. they’re called the Stepan company. they decocanize the leaves before sending them to Coca Cola for the next step in the procedure. They DO get some real cocaine out of the process. They sell it to Mallinckrodt. Big pharma. I don’t know what they do with it. If you really care I’ll try to find out. Oh and Stepan is watched like a hawk by the DEA plus they are in New Jersey in the same town as the accountant, oddly enough. Same town Bay City Blues used to have a post office box in until we moved to rain country.
anyway i read the formula years ago in a book called ‘Big Secrets’ written by Poundstone.
he got it from several places but it’s known as the Merory recipe as it basically comes from Merory’s book. The book is called “Food Flavorings: Composition, Manufacture and Use.” It’s from 1968. but they haven’t changed much. A guy named Pendergrast wrote a book published in 2000 called “For God, Country and Coca-Cola” and he thinks it’s the same recipe. there’s other ones but this is right. stick with me i wouldn’t mislead you. besides even wikipedia has it for pete’s sake. i had it in city hall but that’s gone and none of you remember it anyway. and i don’t blame you.
it won’t help with phone sex (google bites. fuck google. phone sex google. blow me google. there. phone sex phone sex phone sex. i feel better now)
but you can impress a geek somewhere
if you wanna make coca cola or a clone nobody can tell the difference, thank poundstone, merory, pendergrast, pemberton (look him up). and now me. here you are:
Makes one U.S. gallon (3.8 L) of syrup. Yield (used to flavor carbonated water at 1 fl oz per bottle): 128 bottles, 6.5 fl oz (192 ml).
Mix 2,400 grams of sugar with just enough water to dissolve the sugar fully. High-fructose corn syrup may be substituted for half the sugar).
Add 37 grams of caramel, 3.1 grams of caffine, and 11 grams of phosphoric acid.
Extract the cocaine from 1.1 grams of coca leaf (Truxillo growth of coca preferred) with toluol;dry the cocaine extract. (This is the part you need DEA approval for. Good luck. And let me know what Mallinckrodt pays for cocaine.)
Soak the coca leaves and kola nuts (both finely powdered; 0.37 gram of kola nuts) in 22 grams of 20 percent alcohol. (See above. Continued good luck to you.)
California white wine fortified to 20 percent strength was used as the soaking solution circa 1909, but Coca-Cola may have switched to a simple water/alcohol mixture. (Almost definitely. Like it’s going to matter to you.)
After soaking, discard the coca and kola and add the liquid to the syrup.
Add 30 grams of lime juice (a former ingredient, evidently, that Coca-Cola now denies) or a substitute such as a water solution of citric acid and sodium citrate at lime-juice strength. (my guess is citric acid instead of lime. or the coca cola people lie. gasp!)
Mix together 0.88 gram of lemon oil, 0.47 gram of orange oil, 0.20 gram of cassia (Chinese cinnamon) oil. 0.07 gram of nutmeg oil, and, if desired, traces of coriander, lavender, and neroli oils, and add to 4.9 grams of 95 percent alcohol.
Shake.
Add 2.7 grams of water to the oil mixture and let stand for twenty-four hours at about 60 °F (15.5 °C). A cloudy layer will separate.
Take off the clear part of the liquid only and add the syrup.
Add 19 grams of glycerine (from vegetable source, not hog fat, so the drink can be sold to Jews and Muslims who observe their respective religion’s dietary restrictions) and 1.5 grams of vanilla extract.
Add water (treated with chlorine) to make 1 gallon of syrup.
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It’s really kind of easier just to buy it. Older recipes such as the one discussed in court in 1909, had sugar only as opposed to high fructose corn syrup. So does the “passover” recipe…which is probably available like uh NOW in certain places. though i am not going out looking for it in portland.
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it’s also time for an amendment from the bill of rights isn’t it?
Amendment IV
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.
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Without ones like this, we wouldn’t be America. we’d just be another place that sucks. which we’re close enough to as it is.
This means they can’t just come in because they don’t like you. And it means if they DO act like assholes, they can’t USE the stuff they stole from you. and that’s because our courts said so. and if you don’t understand all this, go fuckin’ learn about it. and DON’T LET GO OF YOUR FUCKIN’ RIGHTS. morons.
later
howard
